One thing I have known over the years is the fact that, you will miss the time spent with your family more than you spent at work. Just cast your mind to your last job. If you were fired, none of your colleagues will bother to reach out. If you left to a new job, you may stay in contact with a few and occasionally exchange texts in the few days of leaving. If you retired, you may never hear from any of them, except for the occasional text or cards during the festivities. After this, you will only see the family you left unattended to for the rest of your life.
If you have children or family, make it a point to include as much time as you can with the family. They must be the priority and must come first!
The sad part of life and reality is that, time is of the essence. If you have children, every step of their growth is important as they grow so fast that, you will miss them more even if they are living with you.
That is why it is not advisable to leave raising your own children with anyone. If you are not careful you may miss the opportunity to form a bound with your own children.
If you are in a relationship, you need enough time to be with your spouse to get to enjoy the early phase of the relationship and get enough time to nurture it to grow.
Ideally, you should be financially sound before starting a family or settling down with anyone so that, you are not forced to sacrifice your time with family at work but not everyone has the luxury to be well established to do it this way. I understand that most of the time, unbearable situations makes this impossible and I also know that, there are some people who become parents when they are not fully prepared for the complexities of family or raising a child.
The stay at home parent is extremely busy talk less of the full time working mother. If you know anyone doing this, raising children with or without a job, be nice to them and wish them well when possible.
The good news is that, there are several things you can do together to Maximax the benefit of the time spent with the family.
You may think time spent with the family is nothing but remember, the memory the children get is for life and when they become adults, they will never forget. We must consciously put in the extra effort to make this happen.
My father used to make it a point to have dinner with all his children. I recommend you do same with your children. Eating together is a great time to have nice conversations.
This is the time where the tablets and phones are off and we get to discuss how we are enjoying our meals, what we will want to eat for next meal, talk about school, homework, what they want to do for the weekend, next day after school, any cool thing they came across?
For those in developed countries, there is the option of hourly jobs that help to do both. There is the flexibility of the time but one thing we must learn to do when we get home, is to put down the phone and actually spend the time with the family.
I thought it was odd that, whenever I visited my friend, she was 90% of the time, on phone talking with someone whiles the husband is sitting down watching TV. Occasionally, he had to signal to ask her a question anytime he had to talk to her. Needless to say, the marriage fell apart with no distinct reason. I have always stated that, that may have caused them to drift apart.
Both parents in the home is great for the children and we must work on maintaining that. If we learn to love each other’s company, we will be able to foster a family bound that is unbreakable.
Using money to raise children is not the best way to raise children. I know some people who never stepped foot in their children’s schools or never had the time to take them to a playground or any event.
Most people leave raising their own children to others, mind you, the children will always remember what the care takers did for them, appreciate that more than what the parent spent money to do for them.
I can’t believe we still have parents after all the available data still outsource raising their children to others such as house helps, nannies and other family members even when they are capable. Some parents cannot even if they can do something as little as having a chat, reading time or watching something interesting with their children. That is not good enough because they grow so fast and in no time, they would not need you anymore, and the opportunity to form a family bound is missed all because we spent our time, growing somebody’s company or engaging in needless chat and gossips with other people at the expense of our very own families.
There is more we can do with our children and actually have fun whiles at the same time teaching them valuable life lessons.
Eat together or eat at the same table. Sing together, do karaoke, play a game, etc.
If you have younger kids, you tend to enjoy their school projects with them. it becomes more fun when you sit with them and look at the project, draw the plan of the project, come to agreement on what you will do and go source for raw materials, either in the store, market or even in your backyard.
If you try this, you will understand the joy in finally seeing your hard work come to life and the joy your child shows when they take it to school and make the presentation.
I believe you have realized whenever you find yourself in trouble, your first point of consolation is the family? That is why, you absolutely must take a break and ask yourselves if you are indeed spending enough time with the family and make the necessary changes to your lifestyle in order to spend time with them.
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